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Day 37 
By StopPop  on January 26 2012 at 8:03 am

27, Female
United Kingdom
Member Since: December 21 2011


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Managed to go out for a meal last night with some friends, had a good time and a nice chat. Was so tired when i got back from work, but forced myself to go and glad I did as I ended up having a nice time despite not smoking or drinking alcohol.

Avoiding alcohol is working out so well for me, it was always my main trigger for smoking, and I was wasting a lot of time, money and energy on both these things that were having a very destructive effect on me, my relationship, my work and my life. I got into some situations last year through drinking that I am very ashamed of and now I'm sober and clear headed I spend a lot of time every day regretting things and wishing I could turn the clock back. I was such an idiot. I'm not religious but I feel I need to repent for my actions somehow. Not sure what to do, hence it's on my mind a lot!

I'm happy my quit has come this far, and my sights are set on being quit for a year, then multiple years. I'm still getting cravings, had someone upset me yesterday with some nasty emails and that nearly threw me back but I'm strong enough to not jump straight back to damaging  me and my health when it is the other person that has the problem and it is not something I've done, they are just upset at something else and lashing out at whoever is trying to help.

I always thought of myself as such a strong independent person, but in recent times I have realised that I am quite fragile really in a lot of ways. I have a tough exterior and like to act like nothing bothers me,I don't really care and i don't need anyone but in actual fact I've realised I do need support, help and people to listen, and am quite easily hurt.

This will definately be a year of reassessing myself, what I want to do with my life, and making up for my rubbishy past.

StopPop quit the fags on 19/12/11
If I can do it, then so can you! x

 

Message by skipper8  View Journal on January 26 2012 at 10:45 am 
Location: Canada   Joined: July 02 2002   Posts: 12289   View skipper8's ProfileProfile Search for other entries by skipper8Search Quote skipper8Quote
Sounds like a exciting year in store for you - I am sure it will be a lot of fun and very insightful...

You have made a great start with your quit- Keep that going strong and the rest will follow !

~~The time is always right , to do what is right ~~ KTQ ~~Kathy

QD- 21-11-11 :)

Message by peter d  View Journal on January 26 2012 at 11:39 am 
Location: United States   Joined: January 01 2008   Posts: 9826   View peter d's ProfileProfile Search for other entries by peter dSearch Quote peter dQuote
Welcome to the club as far as wishing we could "turn back the clock"

it is a large club, with perhaps the
largest membership of any organization
since the beginning of time

as one of our all time champions likes to say,,,,,

"What were we thinking"



quit date--Dec 26, 2007
hold on tight to your dream,,,,

Message by Dewey  View Journal on January 26 2012 at 2:47 pm 
Location: Australia   Joined: March 21 2010   Posts: 2121   View Dewey's ProfileProfile Search for other entries by DeweySearch Quote DeweyQuote
Congratulations on 37 days of being cigarette free.  You should be very proud of yourself.

I don't think there would be anyone on this site that doesn't cringe at some of the stupid and foolish things that we have done in the past.  Your post made me wish that I had been more like you and quit many years before I did.

Quitting is often a time when we reassess our lives and go on to bigger and better things.

Dewey 

Going my way
Quit Date: 22.03.2010

Message by Earlz  View Journal on January 26 2012 at 8:55 pm  -  moderator
Location: United States   Joined: July 16 2002   Posts: 11611   View Earlz's ProfileProfile Search for other entries by EarlzSearch Visit Earlz's homepagewww Quote EarlzQuote
Just my own thoughts any time you feel you need to do some thing to enjoy yourself you are probably not enjoying yourself, that's not to say that there is any thing wrong with having a drink.

At some point we have to face our smoking triggers they are not going to go away because we avoid them. It's up to each of us to choose the time and place that we deal with the smoking triggers.
 
We all have baggage things that we wish we could get a do over to deal with and in fact we do, we can't undo the past but we can learn from it.

I think you are doing great your decision to tackle smoking and control the social environment that you are in just speaks to how well you are doing  

RYN Thank you



Protect the Children
Quit Date 11/19/2000


Message by betsy  View Journal on January 26 2012 at 9:24 pm 
Location: United States   Joined: January 11 2004   Posts: 30628   View betsy's ProfileProfile Search for other entries by betsySearch Quote betsyQuote
we all have things in our past that haunt us at times
what it means is we all have learned something by going through these experiences

You are doing great
this is truly a journey into self awareness
happy traveling

betsy QD 11/10/03
Today is the best day to not smoke!

Message by ozzy  View Journal on January 27 2012 at 2:35 am 
Location: South Africa   Joined: February 10 2009   Posts: 3847   View ozzy's ProfileProfile Search for other entries by ozzySearch Quote ozzyQuote
 I am proud of you Pop.  I wish you all the very best.
Don't dream up thousands of reasons
why you can't do what you want to; find one reason why you CAN.

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